Holiday Shipping

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Welcome. We’ve been expecting you. This way to partake of the 

Wisdom of the Shipping Philosophers

But First! Take heed

In addition to ordinary challenges (snow! rain! heat! gloom! night!), the Wisdom of the Shipping Philosophers takes into account UPS deadlines and USPS cutoffs – not to mention COVID-19 slow-downs and seasonal new staff training.

The result is the most reliable schedule possible – and your gifts’ best chance for delivery by Thursday, December 24th, 2020!

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For destinations within the CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES

Through Tuesday, December 8th

Any shipping method is acceptable. 

 

Starting Wednesday, December 9th

Choose UPS 3-day at check-out.

 

Starting Monday, December 14th

Choose UPS 2-day at check-out.

 

Starting Tuesday, December 15th  Through 11:00AM EST Wednesday, December 16th

Your only option: choose overnight shipping at check-out.

 

After 11:00AM Wednesday, December 16th there is little hope for your order to arrive by Thursday, December 24th

Not with begging and pleading!

Not with moaning and threatening!

Not even with overnight shipping!

…keep scrolling to COMPLIMENTARY SHIPPING CONSULTATION 

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INTERNATIONAL ORDERS

Canada

Canadian customers only

Monday, November 23rd is the last day to order for Standard Shipping

Monday, November 30th is the last day to order for USPS First-Class Package International and USPS Priority Mail International

  

Australia

Our Amazon.com.au page carries most of the items in our catalogue. Look here first for faster and cheaper shipping. If the site doesn’t carry what you’re looking for, see All Other Countries (below) before you order on our website.

  

All Other Countries

Increased holiday demand and intermittent COVID-19 disruptions affect postal service world-wide. For the best chance of on-time delivery, choose either USPS First-Class Package International (if available) or USPS Priority Mail International.

Our recommended shipping dates:

Before Monday, November 9th for destinations in Mexico or the Middle East

By end-of-day Wednesday, November 18th for destinations in any other countries.

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Will recipients see prices or my billing info?

PACKING SLIPS AND CHARGES  

When you order directly from The Unemployed Philosophers Guild website (PhilosophersGuild.com), the shipment arrives with a packing slip that lists the items in the shipment. However, no prices or billing information appears on packing slips, individual items, or packaging.

Receipts are emailed separately to the sender’s account at time of checkout.

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Help! I am a seeker of wisdom…or just confused

May I Visit the Oracle at UPG?

The Shipping Philosophers are jarringly wise; however, they possess limited power over jam-packed seasonal delivery trucks, Mother Nature, or entropy… and this keeps them humble. We implore your patience and compassion and thank you in advance for your understanding of utilitarianism, the categorical imperative, and thermodynamics.

UPG’s expert Shipping Philosophers are available for discourse and prognostication during philosophical business hours:
Monday through Friday 9:30AM to 5:00PM-ish  Brooklyn Ivory Tower time
(except November 26th & 27th, December 24th & 25th,, and January 1st ).

You may call or email to receive your

COMPLIMENTARY SHIPPING CONSULTATION

sales@PhilosophersGuild.com

800.255.8371              

718.243.9492

The Philosophers will help you figure things out. If you’ve missed a shipping deadline, they will seek last-ditch heroic efforts to be made.

Should it transpire there is no solution so – crazy – it – just – might – work… they’ll suggest a UPG Gift Certificate and appropriate revivifying beverage.